CHP 24 Where it All Began

It's been a week since thanksgiving and Jay's birthday is a week away. I been bugging out a bit lately because Im not gonna be there for his birthday and he's gonna be out in Miami handling business and working. So it's bad on both ends. Things would be so much easier if I wasn't going to be out of the country. If i was in the states i could have just flew in and flew right back out. I know it's killing Jay with him knowing I'm going to miss his birthday, because it's killing me. I'll just be happy when these 2 weeks past, because at least then i have a little time to spend with him then.


With me leaving out of town in 2 days, my mom wanted to meet with me and discuss the situation between my dad and Jay. Although she was going to be coming with me, she just didn't want me leaving on bad terms with my dad. It's not too often that me and my dad are mad at each other, he and I actually has a tight bond. He is normally more reasonable with me then my mom is. I also wanted to talk with my mom to clear things up. The last thing i wanted to happen was this. Jay and I have a good thing going and i want the people i love to respect that.


I met up with my mom at her house. It was good because my dad was back in Houston, so i didn't have to worry about seeing him. I walked in and made my way to the living room, and waited for her to come down.


***(Ms. Tina's house)


(Ms. Tina) walking down the stairs "Hey baby, you didn't bring Solo with you?" she asked as she approached the couch.


(Bey) standing up to hug Ms. Tina "Hey mama and nooo she was actually back at the studio with Kanye, you know Jays friend....You know she Dj's" i said as we sat down.


(Ms. Tina) adjusting herself to get comfortable "Oh. And yea she told me. But I had some things i wanted to give to her, stuff she'll need and what not for it."


(Bey) "Oh okay, well i can just take it back with me. I don't have anything to do for the rest of the day."


(Ms. Tina) "Ok, and thats good."


(Bey) "So what has dad been up too, has he's said anything to you." i asked, changing the subject, trying to get directly to the point.


(Ms. Tina) "Well.......you know how your father is. I know he wasn't right for saying that, but you know how he felt about Tony?"


(Bey) rolls her eyes "I know, but he doesn't know Jay. He just see's him as the image he presents but he's nothing like that ma, it's more too him then yal think."


(Ms. Tina) "I know baby, i spoke with him for a min at thanksgiving. The thing with your dad and also feel like this a bit too..."


(Bey) makes a face 


(Ms. Tina) "Don't you feel like it's a bit too soon to be jumping into a relationship."


I was beginning to get irritated.


(Bey) "If i felt like that mom, then i wouldn't even be with him right now."


(Ms. Tina) "Okay." she said grabbing buy hand, sensing my frustration " I know your a smart girl and i also know that you know what you're doing, and i just want to say that i wish you and Shawn nothing but happiness." she said smiling.


(Bey) "Thanks mom."


(Ms. Tina) rubbing Bey's arm in comfort "And your father he'll come around. I'll make sure of it." she said winking at me.


(Bey) letting out a sift chuckle "I sure hope so." i said in a low reassuring tone. 


(Ms. Tina) "Come one" she said grabbing my hand and pulling me up "Lets go in the kitchen and have some drinks."


(Bey) "let's go" i said and followed her into the kitchen.




I was more relaxed about the situation after talking to my mom. Im glad she was honest with me but came around to my side. If only i could do that with my dad. But i wasn't going to think about that right now. I was going to sit and have some drinks with my mom. I spent most of the rest of my day at my mom's. We sat and drank and talked some more. We talked about so many things. Of course she asked me a lot of questions about Jay. I told her about our weekend in LA and how's good he's been to me. My mom must have really been happy for me or in such a good mood because i aint never see her drink so much. She was opening up to me telling me personal things about her and my father, i guess my new relationship with Jay made her feel some type of way. She told me how her and mom dad's relationship started off so good, but things switched up as times went on. She talked about how he had a gambling problem and that he was always out partying and with girls, but she once never caught him cheating. But despite it all she stuck around and they ended up getting married, and well you know the story. But she said she was on the verge of leaving him, but her threatening to leave made him realize how much he needed to change. When she told me that it made me think about Jay and I, but i couldn't picture things getting like that between us. After my mom started talking about some more crazy things, i knew it was time to go. It was starting to get out of hand. I made sure she was in bed by the time i left. 


I was at my mom's for so long, that i didn't get home until like 9 o'clock. I checked my phone in the car in saw that i had a couple calls and missed text's from Jay. But when i tried calling and texting him back he didn't reply. I was thinking that maybe he was either sleep or in studio. When i got home, i checked around to see if i saw him, but it was just Solo., she was coming out of the kitchen.


(Bey) "Hey, your home earlier then usual." i said joking.


(Solo) "Yea, i've been here since about 6."


(Bey) sits down on the couch "Oh. Really? Why, where's Ye?"


(Solo) "He said he had to leave early for something that was going on tonight."


(Bey) "Tonight? What's going on tonight?" i asked all confused. I was wondering if i had missed missed something i should have known about.


(Solo) "I don't know. He aint really go into details."


(Bey) "Was Jay at the studio today?"


(Solo) "Nope, but he did come home."


(Bey) "How long ago?"


(Solo) "like an hour ago."


I checked my phone of the time to reassure myself of the time, also to calculate the time he came in to try and pin point where he could be. 


(Solo) "Whats with all the questions?"


(Bey) "huh?" i said snapping out my thoughts.


(Solo) chuckling "I said whats with all the questions?"


(Bey) "Oh nothing, you talked to Daddy?" i asked trying to change the subject.


(Solo) "Daddy? i thought you too weren't speaking?"


(Bey) "We're not, I'm just asking have you talked to him."


(Solo) giving me a look ".....No." she said a little hesitant "I haven't talked to him since thanksgiving."


(Bey) "Oh....." i said getting up "Well I'm about to go up and shower."


(Solo) "alright. Are you hungry? Im making taco's."


As much as i did want some taco's, i just wasn't in the mood. My focus was strictly Jay.


(Bey) walking up the stairs "Na, I'm good."


(Solo) yells to Bey "Okay."


I got up stairs and gathered my things to get in the shower. I was really thinking hard about where Shawn could be and why he wasn't answering my phone calls. I started thinking about what my mind was saying about my dad and him always being out and partying. I even thought about driving to his place to see if he was there. I tried to shake the thoughts out my head. I didn't want to believe thats how things would be with Jay and I. Im sure where ever he was or what ever he was doing he has a good explanation, so i shouldn't worry to much. After gathering my things, i turned the shower on to let it run for a min so it could run hot like i wanted. While i waited i called Kelly to see if she would know anything, but she didn't answer. I just figured i would let it go and deal with it when i see him. So i took my shower and got ready for bed. After taking my shower, i checked my phone to see if Jay had called or something and he did. I hurried and called him back, but it went straight to voicemail. I looked at my phone again because i was about to call back, but i saw that he left a voicemail. I checked it and it was a lot of music and loud noise in the background, so i didn't hear anything he said. I just sat my phone on the night stand to charge and went on to sleep.




The next day when i awoke Shawn still wasn't there. I checked my phone to see if he called or anything, but he still didn't. I decided i was just going to go over there. I didn't have anything planned until the afternoon, so i had a little time. I went in the bathroom to freshen up. I through on some clothes and left. On my way to Jay's, i decided i was going to call and see if i got a answer and sure enough he did.




......................(Phone Convo)


(Jay) "Hello." his voice was very rough and raspy.


(Bey) "Hello.......Jay.....Whats the matter you sound sick or something."


(Jay) clears throat "No, I'm good."


(Bey) "Well I'm headed to your house, i'll be there in about 10 more mins."


(Jay) "Okay." he said then hung up.


Shortly after hanging up with Jay, i was pulling up at his house. When i walked in he was sitting at the table eating some oatmeal, with a glass of milk. He also looked exhausted to the max, like he was hung over or something. He just looked at me as i walked over and sat at the table.


(Bey) "Weeeeeell good morning." i said trying to set the tone.


I didn't want it to seem like i had an attitude or was even tripping on him being out. I tried to approach the conversation as subtle as possible. But i really wanted to yell out "Where the hell were you."


(Jay) takes a sip of milk "Goo morning" he voice still sounding all dry.


(Bey) "You look rough" i said, trying to take a shot at him.


(Jay) gives Bey a look


(Bey) "So what happened to you last night, i called you back like 8 times and i texted."


(Jay) rubs his hands over his face "Oh man...." he said letting out a yarn "I went out with Ye, last night."


(Bey) "What yal do?" i asked all curious.


(Jay) "Shit." he said eating some more of his oatmeal. "We had some drinks and what not. He told me to meet him at Charley's. I guess it was some pre-party surprise or something for me."


(Bey) "Oh okay."


(Jay) "You mad?" he said going to take his empty bowl in the kitchen. He finished up his milk as he dropped his bowl in the sink.


(Bey) "Well i wasn't mad, i didn't have anything to be mad about. What ima be mad because you were out having fun."


(Jay's thoughts)
I was relieved to hear that Bey wasn't mad. Thats the last thing i needed to hear this morning, especially being all hung over and stuff.


(Jay) "I mean don't know. I don't know what you'll get mad about." he joked.


(Bey) "And it's not like you didn't try to call or anything."


(Jay) "Oh so what was going to happen if i didn't call?" he said walking towards me.


(Bey) gives Jay a look 


(Jay) chuckles "Ha calm down."


(Bey) "Keep playing with me." i said trying to punch him in the stomach, but he caught my hand.


(Jay) starts rubbing up Bey's arm "Can i have a kiss?"


(Bey) snatches her arm away "No and Did you even brush your teeth?" i joked.


(Jay) "Yea, i brushed my teeth." he said letting out a laugh.


(Bey) "Welp, your still not getting one." i said turning my head away.


(Jay) "Aw why you being like that?" he said tugging on my hair.


(Bey) "Stop" i said fanning his hand away "You are a pest." i said poking my lips up to kiss him, i decided to give in.


(Jay) kisses Bey "But you love me though."


(Bey) "Not really." i teased. "So how's your schedule looking for today?"


(Jay) walks back in the kitchen "Uuuuuh, i got a few things to take care of. I got some stuff to do in the studio, you?"


(Bey) "Well I'm going to the studio today, to finish up on some tracks. I'll be doing that today and tomorrow until i leave."


(Jay) looking in the fridge "OH. How long are you going to be gone again."


(Bey) "2 weeks."


(Jay) "Man" he mumbles 


(Bey) When you leave again?


(Jay) "The 3rd."


(Bey) "Oh so you'll be in Miami for your birthday?"


(Jay) "Yea." he said a little sad.


(Bey) "If i could you know i would be there, but i can't."


(Jay) closes the fridge, sighs "I know."


(Bey) laughs 


(Jay) "Whats so funny?"


(Bey) "You are."


(Jay) "How am i funny?" he said with a grin on his face.


(Bey) "Because you just set there looking in the refrigerator all that time and not get anything...." chuckles "You kill me."


(Jay) ''Hush up punk!" he said making his way back towards me. "Can i have another kiss?" he said leaning in over me.




(Bey) smiles and kisses Jay "When are you going to go shower and get ready."


(Jay) stretching out "Weeeell" he said yarning "Im about to go take one now, why you ask, you wanna join?"


(Bey) smacks her lips "Pssh Boy" she said patting down her hair "No. I am not trying to get my hair wet again, it takes forever to dry."


(Jay) with a grin on his face "How about i just bend you over and you can stick your head out the door." he joked.


(Bey) gives Jay a look "No. And don't make me punch you."


(Jay) walking towards his room laughing "You look cute when your nose is all flared up."


(Bey) yells to Jay "Got get in the shower big head."


Jay kills me, he is always trying to find someway to have sex. I waited out in the living room and watched some tv until he was done showering and getting ready. Once he was done, we just chilled out at his place until it was time for him to leave. His day started before me. But i wasn't doing anything but going to the studio, which i could go anytime. Since i didn't have anything else planned i just went on ahead to the studio. I got to the studio and started working on more songs, the ones that i had started on anyway. I was working for about 5 hours by myself until Solo showed up. I was still in the booth, when she came in. I was so into it, i didn't even noticed she had came in.


(Solo) knocking on the window "Oooohhh sounds good" she said, but i couldn't hear anything she was saying.


(Bey) coming out the booth "What were you saying?"


(Solo) "I was saying, the song sounds good."


(Bey) smiling "Thanks..........i didn't even know if you were still coming or not." i said letting out a chuckle.


(Solo) "Oh yea, i had caught up doing some stuff."


(Bey) "Oh okay."


(Solo) "So, how may songs have you finished so far...." she said looking at some sheets of paper laid out on the table.


(Bey) "Well about 4 maybe 5, but i got so much more to do."


(Solo) "Oh thats good, well i got a few instrumentals i want you to listen to." she said pulling out her laptop "I think they'll match well with your songs."


(Bey) "Okay, let's see." I said siting down.


Solo set up her laptop and begin playing the songs. Some of her instrumentals i was feeling but the other's i really didn't, only because they weren't my style of music.


(Bey) "Well i like this, this, this, and that one." i said pointing out the ones i liked.


(Solo) "Okay, cool. Well on that note let's start working." she said.


(Bey) "Okay, let's finish up the one i was just in the booth doing because it's almost done, i just have to lay down this last verse." i said walking back into the booth.


(Solo) getting situated by the control system "Alright, lets do this." she said getting all excited.


(Bey) giggling "You are crazy." i said laughing at her. 


(Solo) "Oh hush up and get in the booth."


I got back into the booth and started recurring, about 45 mins later we were done. The name of the song i just finished was called I rather be with you. This was a song that Solo and I wrote together, one day after having a conversation about both of guys explaining why we love them. Of course the conversation turned comical, but we decided i should use it as a song. I actually like the song though because it's so sexual and so smooth flowing. A couple of other songs i've completed were called baby boy, me myself and I, a gift from a virgo, and a duet Jay and i did call thats how you like it. Me, Myself, and I was a song i wrote about Tony after finally coming to realize he was no good for me. It something that we as women need to realize. Why keep a man around and put up with their shit, when we can do bad all by ourself. But thank god i had Jay their to see me through, because lord know how i've would have turned out. And me and Jay's duet thats how you like it, was just recently recorded after the the whole situation after Thanksgiving, because despite what anyone feels about Jay, i like him for who he is. 


After finishing up on I rather be with you. I took a brief break. I checked my phone and noticed i had a text from Jay, but he was just checking on me and letting me know what he was doing. I texted him back to let him know i got his text and it what i was doing. I knew it wouldn't be long until he was done and would come to the studio. After my little break, i got back into the studio and started working on another song. The beat that i was going to be recording on next was a real funky beat, it reminded me of when i did the Austin Power's movie i just finished last year. Since the movie was still being talked about and promoted, i decided i was going to dedicate that song to the movie, and so i did. Solo and I were in the studio for about another 3 hours before Jay arrived. But when he came in i want in the studio. Solo and I were listening to what i had already recorded for the song and was seeing if we needed to change something or add something. 


(Jay) "Is that a new one already?" he asked walking over to us.


(Bey) turns to look at Jay "Yup, Solo came up with the beat and helped me with the lyrics."


(Jay) goes to sit down "Oh okay, thats tight."


(Bey) gets up and goes sit next to Jay "You look tired." 


(Jay) "I am, I'm still feeling that shit from last night." he said sitting up leaning over.


(Bey) places her arm around Jay and put her head over his shoulder "Aw my poor baby." she said kissing his cheek. Then all of a sudden.......RING RING RING.


My phone started ringing and when i checked the caller ID i didn't recognize the number. I set out in the hall and answered the phone. Being that i had to use the bathroom, i figured the call wouldn't take long and i'd already be close to the bathroom.


.................(PHONE CONVO)


(Bey) "Hello"


(Person) "Hey how are you?"


I didn't recognize the voice at all, i just new it was a guy.


(Bey) "Im fine, but may i ask who's calling?"


(Person) gets quiet


(Bey) "Hello, are you still there?"


(Person) takes a deep breath "Bey, it's me.....Tony." he said all calm.


I was completely thrown off. I was not expecting him to be calling. I looked back to see if Jay was at the door but he wasn't. I walked down to the bathroom and closed the door. I wanted to know why he was calling. After all this time, what would make him call me?

(Bey) "Tony" i said, as if i had heard wrong.


(Tony) "Yea....please dont hang up. I know I'm the last person you want to speak to right now, but i just wanted to call you."


(Bey) "Why are you calling, what do you want? If your trying to get back with me you could hang that up now." i snapped.


(Tony) "No it's nothing like that i swear."


(Bey) "Well what is it?"


(Tony) "I was calling because i heard through the grape vine, that you've been in the studio recording."


(Bey) "Yes i have, what does that have to do with anything?"


(Tony) "Well i knew back in the day you use too, but i never ever thought you would actually go and record one day."


(Bey) stays quiet. 


I was still a little taken off by Tony calling and now he's being all nice and wanna act like he remember shit. I had no clue if he was being sincere or was just being Tony.


(Tony) "Well i just wanna say I'm happy for you and i wish you nothing but success."


(Bey) "Thank you." i said very dryly, but i was actual flattered that Tony was calling.


(Tony) "Your welcome. Look Bey, I ju---"


(Bey) "Look just stop. Let's not pretend like where friends or anything because where not. We're far from over....."


(Tony) "Just listen to me for a moment."


As much as i wanted to hang up, i still wanted to hear what he had to say.


(Bey) sighs "Okay, what?"


(Tony) "Look i know things between us ended bad and I know our relationship wasn't one of the best, and i am the one to blame for that."


(Bey) "You got that right."


(Tony) "Come on Bey, I'm trying to be tea right now. I know you don't owe me anything and probably don't want anything to do with me. But with the way things ended between us, i just couldn't let it go. There's not a day that goes by that i don't think about it."


(Bey) "And so."


(Tony) "Look Bey, seeing you at Chris's party really had me thinking about things. You been a big part of my life for the past 10 years....I guess I'm just trying to say is that I wanna at least be able to be friends with you. Come on it's been nearly 2 months since we've been through. I think we can be able to at least build back upon a friendship."


As much as i hated Tony, i did still love him, not enough to go back to him though. He was my first everything, which will never change but i wasn't sure if i could do the whole friend thing. Especially after what he and Jay had been through. Just knowing that i was on the phone with him would cause Jay to lose it and I wasn't going to jeopardize that for anything or anyone not even Tony. 


(Bey) "I don't know Tony, i haven't spoken to you in about 2 months. Things in my life right now have been great. There's no hard feelings between me and you, I'm completely over everything. I have Jay in my life and you have Victoria. You should be worrying more about you and her relationship, then worrying about trying to be friends with me."


(Tony) "I completely understand, well it was nice talking to you, good luck to you and much happiness for you and Shawn."


(Bey) "Thank you and same to you." i said and hung up.


After hanging up with Tony, i used the bathroom. I also stayed in there a few moments longer to gather myself and my thoughts. I couldn't believe Tony called me and I couldn't believe i even stayed on the phone with him. I did admire his sincerity though, which was something i haven't seen from him in a while. It really made me think has Tony really changed. I didn't want to mention Shawn about Tony calling and what he had said. I figured i was going to keep quiet. Although i knew it was wrong, i just felt it was best if i didn't tell him. I went back into the studio and went on as of nothing happened, but the whole rest of the time all i could do was think about Tony and the whole phone call.






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