CHP39 where it all began

RE-CAP: Sinaa found out about Jay and Shelly and demanded that he tells Bey, before she does. Meanwhile Bey comes into contact with Shelly but they have no clue who each is. Bey finds out that Reggie was beating Kelly. And Jay finally confesses to Bey, about him and Shelly.


(Chapter Mood Introduction)
It's been a week since Bey found out about Jay and Shelly, and although she's hiding her true anger, she is still dealing with it. Jay on the other hand has fired Shelly and went to get his test done like Bey said. Jay's been walking on egg shells with Bey. She was now just 4 months. Bey coming into the first stage of her 2nd trimester has caused her to be very emotional, especially now that she has a nice firm baby bump. So from time to time she just lashes out on Jay out her frequent mood swings. Bey's also looking for extra help around the house, being that she preparing early for the arrival of the baby. Also they've been planing a get together for there friends and family to announce the news of their pregnancy.


........................

Jay and I were driving in there car....well he was driving i was riding shot gun. It was hot as hell, my stomach was cramping bad, i was hungry, and on top of that i had been riding around in this car for over 2 hours. On top of that i get car sick. My tolerance level was at it's max, and i was highly irritated. 

(Bey) "Got damn Jay..." i said extremely irritated "Where are you going?"

(Jay) "I thought you said you were hungry...." 

(Bey) "I am..."

(Jay) "Well I'm trying to find a place where we can eat."

(Bey) "All these foo---" starts gagging "JAY PULL OVER QUICK." i managed to get out.

But i didn't even wait long enough for him to pull over, i just opened the door as i threw up on the side. Finally we had pulled over. Jay got out the car and came around to my side to help me out.

(Jay) "Are you okay?"

(Bey) in a nice mood "Yea...im just a little noxious from being in the car too long thats all."

(Jay) grabs Bey hand and lock the doors to the car "Well come on lets, walk around for a minute, and maybe even stop in one of these joints they got to eat."

(Bey) "Okay..." i said and follow along side of Jay.

Jay and I walked around for a couple of blocks, i was really enjoying the fresh air and Jay's company. Even though i was just fussing at him in the car. We walked in silence, as we strolled down the sidewalks, holding hands. My mood was much more relax now. We walked a good 10 minutes until we found a nice diner, i honestly could have cared less where we ate, as long as i got me something to eat.

No sooner after we seated, the waiter came over to take our order, Jay didn't order anything, but me on the other hand i ordered just about the whole menu, while Jay just sat there and watched me eat.

(Jay) chuckles at Bey 

(Bey) gives Jay a look "WHAT?" I said with my mouth full of food.

(Jay) "Nothing...your just so cute...with you big little belly and all."

(Bey) smirks and rolls her eyes then continue to eat.

As much as i wanted to laugh, i held it in. I didn't want things to be too comfortable with Jay and I just yet, i mean it's only been a week, i still want him to suffer.

(Jay) "Are you ever gonna fully forgive me for what i did?"

(Bey) stops eating "Maybe some time in the future, but right now I'm still dealing with it. I mean it's only been a week...And although i agreed to work things out...it's still bothers me that it happened."

(Jay) sighs "Yea i understand ...."

(Bey) puts her fork down and sits back in her chair and gives Jay a death stare "I been wanting to ask you something that's been on my mind....and i just gotta know."

(Jay) "And whats that?" i asked nervously.

(Bey) takes a deep breath "How many times...i mean like was it just a hit and quick or was it just and occasional dip in."

(Jay) deep sighs "D...Do you really want to know, i mean does it even matter."

(Bey) "Yes actually it does!" i said with a sharp tone.

(Jay) gets a little agitated "I don't know off hand Bey...it was never really just planned, it was like when we were together things just happened."

(Bey) just sits there rolling her eyes "So how long was this going on?"

(Jay) "A couple of weeks before you came back..."

(Bey) "Slams her fist down on the table really hard."

(Jay) "B!..." he said "Why keep asking all these questions if all you are going to do is just get so worked up."

(Bey) "BECAUSE JAY....i have to know."

(Jay) "Well i honestly don't want to keep talking about it...i mean i messed up what more can i do. I told you i was sorry and I'm willing to do whatever it takes to get us back how we were, but I'm not going to keep walking on egg shells with you..."

(Bey) "Well ma---" she tried cutting in.

(Jay) interrupts Bey "No let me finish...." he said a little upset "You took me back for a reason, and I'm sure that reason is not to make me feel guilty for what i did every chance you get. If you love me, and you wanna continue to love me....go right ahead so we can make this thing work...otherwise i honestly don't see us working out."

(Bey) starts crying "Well what do you want me to do when every man i have ever loved has fucked me over, started with Tony, you, and my dad...."

(Jay) gets a confused look on his face "Your dad?"

(Bey) "Thats right, my own father, after 23 years of marriage he goes and cheat on my mom for some random, low class bitch. And here i am trying to be the best girlfriend, but i can't because of the insecurities i faced from BEING FUCKED OVER TOO MANY TIMES!!!!!"

                (Jays Thoughts)
Damn it all finally hit me, why B is the way she is. And 7 months ago when we go together, not once did she ever think i would be like the guy i am today. How could i be so blind to her feelings and her emotions, that i'd go and screw things up even more for her. If i love B, like i say i love her, then it's time i start showing her. Show her that i am the man she knows me to be, show her i can be the man she wants and needs me to be. Because at the end of the day B is all i ever want and need. And i'll do anything to regain her love and trust again.

(Jay) reaches out and grabs Bey's hand 
"Look B...I know i hurt you in the most worst way, because for once in your life you actually believed in something good...and all i did was prove you wrong...but i want you to know that no matter what i will not give up on us...if you want to be with me and if you love me, then you don't give up on us either. B what you and I share is something so rare and special... " starts touching Bey's stomach  "...and this right here is us, it's what we created...Now are you with us or are you against us because right now I'm feeling all i need in this life of sin is me and my girlfriend..."  he said beginning to sing him and Bey's song. "And i don't care what anybody think of me or says because I'm gonna continue to fight for us..."

Bey looks at up at Jay as if she was seeing him for the first time, she was feeling all the realness and sincerity she felt the moment when she first laid eyes on Jay. This guy here was the guy she fell in love with. And at that moment she knew that the spark was still there.

(Bey) starts singing "Down to ride to the very end is me and my boyfriend..." i said cracking a smile.

(Jay) grabs Bey by the face and kisses her "I love you Beyonce Knowles...."

(Bey) "I love you Shawn Carter."

After our meal, Jay and I headed home. I knew that in my heart that things will get better between Jay and I, and with our little princess growing bigger and bigger by the day, we know that we are going to have to work together for the sake of our child. That mean we are doing to have to agree to disagree when it comes to things or simply learn how to deal with one another. 

Back at the house, Jay didn't want me to do anything but relax. He ran me up a nice hot bubble bath, cooked me my favorite salad (he wants me to eat healthy), and gave me a full out body massage from head to toe.  I was just laid up in bed, as i was propped up by the pillows just relaxing. And Jay was making sure, i was tended too.

(Jay) standing in the doorway of the room "You need me to get you anything, while I'm down stairs..water, snack, magazine...anything?"

(Bey) "No Jay...im fine...you did enough. You go ahead and relax, go watch the game or something."

(Jay) "Are you sure babe?"

(Bey) "Yes I'm sure....now shoo before you start urking my nerves with all this smothering your doing?" i said playfully.

(Jay) chuckles "Alright, Alright....i just wanna make sure your all good."

(Bey) "Yes baby, I'm fine for the millionth time."

(Jay) "Alright.." he said "..well I'm about to head downstairs."

(Bey) "Okay..." i said picking up my phone as it began to ring.

(Jay) "Love you...."starts walking out.

(Bey) "I love you too."

.............................


***(PHONE CONVO)

(Bey) picks up the phone "Hello..." i said, not knowing who it was calling.

(Person) "Hey there darling, how are you doing?"

(Bey) "Hi, and I'm doing fine..." i said still not catching on to the voice.

(Person) "It's been a while....last time i see---"

(Bey) "Wait, I'm sorry who is this?" i said finally asking who it was i was talking too.

(Person) "It's me....Gloria...Shawn's mom."

(Bey) "Ohhh Gloooooria, how are you?.." i said putting my happy voice on "I had no idea this was you."

(Gloria) "Im good. And i've been meaning to call you, i haven't spoken to you in a while..." she said.

(Bey) "Yea i know and I'm sorry i've been so busy...."

(Gloria) "Oh no i understand. I had spoke with Jay a few weeks ago and he had gave me your number because i had been meaning to call you."

(Bey) "Well I'm glad you did because i've been wanting to talk to you about something."

(Gloria) "Oh sure things baby..."

(Bey) "Well Jay and i are hosting this get together at the house and we would love for you and the rest of the fam to come out."

(Gloria) "Oh okay, and when is this now?"

(Bey) "On the 12th, just a little over a week from now."

(Gloria) "Well i would be delighted to come. I'm glad to see that you and Jay are still hanging in there."

(Bey) "Yea, well..."

(Gloria) starts chuckling "I know things don't always go so easy, but love conquers all just remember that."

(Bey) "Aw thanks Gloria, i appreciate your words of wisdom."

(Gloria) "Oh please, call me mom."

(Bey) chuckles "Alright....MOOOOOOM" i said putting a lot of emphasis on mom.

(Gloria) "Okay, love you..see you soon and take care."

(Bey) "Thanks, love you too and you do the same."

After getting off the phone with Gloria, i began to think a lot about what she was saying. I then began to think about my mom and dads relationship, as del as Kelly's,  Gwyn's, and mines. I also began to realize that i couldn't compare my situation with any one else's because we all have our different interpretation and things. And if i was going to be with Jay it was because i wanted to be, not because of what any one else says. But it wasn't long before my thoughts were interrupted by another phone call. This time it was my mother.


***(PHONE CONVO)

(BEY) "Hey mama...how you been?"

(MS.TINA) "Hey baby...and I'm fine. I haven't talked to you in a while...how are things with you and Jay..."

(BEY) "Things are....well we're working things out, I just find out while we were on our break he went and fucked some girl..." i said forgetting i was talking to my mom.

(MS. TINA) "First off language....Second off a BREAK, baby don't you know thats just giving him a lead way to go off an do something....and Thirdly....im glad you too are able to work things out....I actually like Jay and I hope one day he could be my future son in law."

(BEY) chuckles "I know ma, and I'm sorry. But thats funny that you said that because just a couple months ago he proposed."

(MS. TINA) "Oh and I guess you just wasn't going to tell your mother, huh?" she said, she seemed like she was in a good mood.

(BEY) "Well i was until, i took it back."

(MS. TINA) "What you mean you took it back?" she said sounding all disappointed.

(BEY) "Exactly what i said, TOOK IT BACK." i said speaking loud and slowly making sure she heard right.

(MS. TINA) "If i taught you anything, it's too follow your heart and don't be scared to take any chances. To hell with what you've been through. We've all been through things, you just have to learn not to harbor on to those old feelings."

(BEY) "I know ma, I know. But i don't want to talk about...how are things with you and .....ugh my father?"

(MS. TINA) "Things are coming around. We've been in counseling these past couple of months."

(BEY) "I can't believe these men we have to deal with..."

(MS. TINA) "I hear you honey....Men, you can't live with them and yo---"

(BEY) finishes her moms  sentence "You can't live with out them."

(MS. TINA) starts chuckling "Yes indeed..."

(BEY) "Oh mommy, while i have you on the phone before i forget..." i start off "Jay and I are having a get together with all our close family and friends....and well i was just wondering if you could make it."

(MS. TINA) ""Oh of course baby, you know i'll be there. But idk if your father will."

(BEY) "Well i could care less if he comes or not."

(MS. TINA) "Bey he's still your father..."

(BEY) "And....."

(MS. TINA) "Well i can see your getting all worked up, so I'm just go ahead and leave it alone. Where's Solange?"

(BEY) "She's at the studio..."

(MS. TINA) "Well you have her call me and ima go ahead and let you get back to what you are doing."

(BEY) "Alright mommy...i love you."

(MS. TINA) "Love you too baby." she said then hung up.

After getting off the phone, i went off to look for Jay. I was feeling lonely in the room by myself and with my mama and Gloria both calling me back to bad seems odd to me. And both of them telling me things in regards to my relationship is really blowing my mind. i got downstairs and found Jay passed out on the couch. The game was still on. Aw my baby was tired, i thought to myself.

(BEY) shakes Jay and whispers  "Jay....Jay....JAY..." i said finally getting him up "...Get up baby, come on...lets go get in bed."

(Jay) yawns and starts stretching out "Ahhhhh man, i can't believe i dosed off." he said beginning to stand up.

(BEY) "Yea, i know..." grabs ahold of Jay and helps him up "...Now come on...so we can get ready for bed."

(Jay) "Where's Solo, did she make it home yet."

(Bey) "No, she told me last night that she was staying over Sanaa's tonight."

(Jay) starts heading upstairs "Oh alright."

KNOCK< KNOCK< KNOCK

As Jay and I was heading up the stairs, we heard a knock at the door. But the way they were knocking, they were pounding. It was either the police or somebody just trying to get in. I became a little scared as the knock grew louder. I stepped behind Jay as he stepped and from of me and approached the door. I watched as he opened the door to the closet and grabbed out a gun. I sure as hell don't own a gun, when in the hell did he get one. Unless he had it all along and i just never knew. But wtf!!!

(Jay) "Stay back" he said he said as he slowly approached the door.

I did exactly what he said and stood back, i even started walking up the stairs a little bit. Something about Jay in this very moment was a bit of a turn on. I never felt so protected. In my head i was saying HELL YEA, GO JAY! Jay finally made it to the door, he hesitated before opening it but when he snatched it opened, Kelly instantly fell out into his arms.  I rushed back down the stairs when i realized it was and followed behind Jay as he carried her to the couch. I instantly broke down crying.

(Bey) "OMG, Kelly...Kelly..." i called out to her "...Are you okay...JAY tell me she's going to be okay."

(Jay) pushes me back a bit "B, you have to calm down okay...get a grip. Go get a wet towel and a bottle of water."

I quickly ran into the kitchen grabbing a wet towel and some water. When i saw my Kel laying out on the couch, crying and screaming her lungs out, with a black eye, a busted lip, and huge gash over her head, i feel to my knees, weak in my emotions.

(Jay) turns to look at Bey "Aw shit....B....B...B..get up..." he said going to tend to her "Baby, baby are you okay?"

(Bey) regaining her strength "Yea, yea, yea im okay."

(Jay) "okay cool.." he said and started standing up "..I need you to stay here with Kelly....i'll be back..." he said as he picked his gun back off and darted to the door.

(Bey) runs after Jay "Jay where are you going?" i screamed, crying, with face full of tears.

(Jay) "B, go back in the house..." he yelled from his car "Take care of Kelly..i'll be back." he said and scurried off.

It was around 9 o'clock when Jay left, the time now was close to 1. I had called Sanaa over to help me out, because at that moment she was the only person i could think of and besides i wanted to make sure my little sister was okay. My nerves grew bad as the seconds passed. As Kelly laid asleep on the couch, while me, Sanaa, and the girls waited anxiously in the living room.

(Sanaa) began to rub Bey's back "Its going to be okay, I'm sure he's alright."

(Solo) "Yea Bey, he'll be coming home in no time."

(Bey) wimpers "Thanks yal..." and what did you know, Jay came strolling through the door. "OMG JAY..." i said as i ran over to him.

When Jay got into the light, i started trembling as i looked at him covered in blood. All that was going through my mind was what did he do? He came in dropping his gun, on the table by the door. I pulled the door up behind him as he began to walk in the living room.

(Sanaa) stands up "Well i think it's time for us to head out..." looks to Karina "Come on Kari...lets go." hugs Bey as she walks out "I'll call you tomorrow."

(Bey) "Okay.." turns to look at Solo "..your not leaving"

(Solo) "No, Ima stay here tonight."

(Bey) "Alright."

After Sanaa and Karina left, i set with Jay as he poured him up a drink at the bar. He needed me right now and i needed him, so over all we needed each other. Solo went off upstairs as Jay and i remained downstairs.

(Bey) "Jay...what happened?"

(Jay) sips his drinks "I don't wanna talk about it."

(Bey) "Jay....baby please...just tell me what you did?"

Jay doesn't say anything.

(Bey) "You didn't kill him, did you Jay?"

(Jay) "No but i should have..."

(Bey) grabs Jay by the face "NO, you shouldn't have....Jay i know you mad and upset about what happened to Kelly and i am too...but we need you right now...what good are you too tis family if you get killed or end up in jail. Your days of living by the streets are long over, it's more to you then just that."

(Jay) "I know baby...but look at Kelly. Look at what he did to her. She's like a sister to me and i got her back just like she has mines...THAT i just couldn't let go." he said finishing off his drink with out even catching his breath.

(Bey) "I understand that Jay, but listen to me...your temper is going to get you in a world of trouble...once the police get involved then things are going to be a lot different. And i don't think i can bare to lose you again." i said beginning to break down.

(Jay) grabs Bey and kisses her forehead "I know B, i know. But thats just something I'm going to have to deal with when the time comes. But whats done is done and i have to deal with that."

Things get quiet for a minute. Then Jay looks over at Kelly "How she doing?" he said.

(Bey) "She okay, i gave her some meds and it knocked her out. I was too scared to take her to the hospital, i wanted to at least know you were okay."

(Jay) starts getting up "Well we still have to get her to the hospital to get her checked out. Im gonna run upstairs and get some clean clothes on, and you get ready too so that we can take her."

(Bey) "Okay..." i said heading upstairs to get ready.

I let Solo know to get ready so that we could take Kelly to the hospital. It was no way in hell that i was leaving her here alone by herself. After Jay was done getting ready, we got Kelly together and carried her out to the car. We were in pursuit and was on our way to the hospital, when next thing you know we were being pulled over by the police........I just knew things were gonna be bad.